gunshot wound to the head
“you should have told me earlier
at least then i’d've known”
i sat and thought about the facts
silent and alone.
the futility of worry dawned on me
and i became still inside
why resist? it creates more pain
i– just accept you lied.
the way you told me hit me bad
like a bullet from a gun
you’d never tried to meet my eye
since you found you had a son.
the more i thought of our kid in you
our helixes intertwined
the more i realised i had no control
over what you did with mine.
i sat and tried to be reasonable
but i left me feeling resigned
scurtin2 said,
2006-12-17 at 21:32
Why not write a poem with a narrator that actually has a gun shot wound to the head, or a narrator that is describing someone with a gun shot wound to the head? It would allow you to be more specific and carry the same sentiment you have going on in your poem currently. Your title is the most specific imagery in your poem. Go with it.
Andrew Sidwell said,
2006-12-18 at 01:49
The title came at the end, the way most of my titles do… but I might try the same theme again using that metaphor, now you mention it. We’ll see. Thanks!